Redefining Fear
Emotion 1 - Fear
"He who is not everyday conquering some fear has not learned the secret of life."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Fear is an emotion that is part of our DNA. It is engrained in us, in order to keep us safe. There are endless amount of fears in the world; just think about all the phobias the psyche can create. While it can be bold, and rather dangerous, to completely disregard your fears, it is wise to use them as a teacher. Use fear as an internal signal of something that needs attention or focus. Otherwise, fears are repressed and may grow within your shadows to later manifest into something that should be feared.
It is important to look at fear not only in its “scary” sense, but also its tie to our individual values. Fear is subjective, based largely on what we value. Think about it. What do you value? Now, imagine it being taken away. You will notice that fear arise, connected to the triggered value. With this simple example, we can begin to unroot the true nature of fear.
Fear not, as we put fear through the redefining formula.
The Formula
Defining Fear
Triggering and Expressing Fear
Responding, Not Reacting, to Fear
Making Fear Work For YOU
Redefining Fear
Defining Fear
Definitions
(Merriam-Webster): “An unpleasant often strong emotion caused by anticipation or awareness of danger”
(Dictionary.com): “A distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid.”
(Cambridge Dictionary): “An unpleasant emotion or thought that you have when you are frightened or worried by something dangerous, painful, or bad that is happening or might happen.”
(Wikipedia): “Fear is an emotion induced by perceived danger or threat, which causes physiological changes and ultimately behavioral changes, such as mounting an aggressive response or fleeing the threat.”
(Oxford Dictionary): “An unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.”
Generally, there are a few key notes to point out. First, fear is based on a real or perceived impending danger. In each definition, danger is a common word. Danger, real or perceived, is what fear is a reaction to.
Secondly, fear results in a physiological reaction. One example to this reaction is a sympathetic nervous system response. This results in “an accelerate heart rate, widen bronchial passages, decrease motility of the large intestine, constrict blood vessels, increase peristalsis in the esophagus, cause pupillary dilation, piloerection (goose bumps) and perspiration (sweating), and raise blood pressure” (Boundless Anatomy and Physiology).
Third, fear is connected to both the inner and outside world. We may see something externally, while internally triggering the emotion. For example one may see a spider and it may trigger an internal belief in the danger of spiders, causing an emotional reaction. In addition, you may think yourself into a fear and project out into the world. For example, you may have an upcoming presentation to give and think about all the problems that may go wrong.
Before we redefine it, we have a solid basic understanding of the word. Now, its time to get underneath its roots to uncover its true nature.
Triggering and Expressing Fear
Triggering Fear
From the definition above, we concluded the fact that fear and danger are one. A fear is the result of a real or perceived danger. Now, the question remains. What is the danger rooted in? With that, we must understand our personal values.
It is obvious at this point fear is subjective, based on the individual. In addition, fear is an emotion. Emotions are energy. If our values that are, or perceived to be, threatened and in danger, fear emerges. Thus, fears energetic charge (how strong the emotion grips us) is due to the amount of care we hold for the triggered value.
With this, we see the value in catching fear.
First, ask yourself what is it that you are afraid of?
This may be a person, place, thing, or idea.
Then, ask what value feels threatened.
Through this, you can begin to uncover what lies behind the emotion. It is wise to check in with any values triggered to make sure it aligns with what you believe. Sometimes you may catch a value that you have never noticed within you.
It is important to not suppress (do not allow emotions to arise) or repress (allow emotions to rise in and out of awareness without an integration into consciousness). If you do, as previously stated, you may breed something to truly fear. While you want the emotion to play itself out, you also do not want to let it become possessive over you.
Energetic Expression
Fear is expressed energetically in a few ways. First, we already discussed the physical reaction, a stress response, that it has on the body. While this is useful in situations that need quick, face paced decisions/movements, prolonged fight or flight response will tax your mental and physical energy. In this insight, it is wise to notice how your body reacts under fight or flight mode. This awareness will allow you to be able to notice when fears arise, and after some mastery, you may begin to ease its grip (unless there is a bear in front of you and you need all the extra energy to save your life).
If you are familiar with energy, you understand how quick it changes. In a flash, fear is gripping. It can change your state in an instant. While this first kind of fear is known to most, many forget about the long term effects of fear. These long term fears are hidden within our unconscious mind. For example, the fear of life and/or the fear of death. These fears may keep one under stress, in a rather sympathetic neurological state, for prolonged periods. This not only harms the body (especially harmful to the immune system), but limits life.
Finally, fear is based again on values which are subjective to the individual. In this, we have to realize the importance of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs and Fear. If we follow the pyramid, you will notice how fear plays a part in relation to where you fall on the chart.
Level 1: Physiological Needs (air, water, food, shelter, sleep, clothes, etc)
Level 2: Safety Needs (job, money, security, health)
Level 3: Love and Belonging Needs (friends, relationships, connections, intimacy)
Level 4: Esteem Needs (respect, status, confidence, strength)
Level 5: Self-Actualization (mastering your full potential in life)
With this chart, we see how fears will decrease as you climb. If you are struggling at level one, fear will tend to be high. As you climb towards levels 4 and 5, you notice how fears begin to flee. This is rather important, as you will notice fear is a powerful tool in checking in with your growth. In addition, fears that were once claimed may come back to haunt. If you are striving towards self-actualization, and suddenly your spouse leaves you. While we are at it, lets say the following week you then lose your job. You may notice fear pick up its grip, as your needs have shifted.
Responding, Not Reacting, to Fear
Reacting
Fear is a difficult emotion to catch in the short term. A short burst of fear can be rather difficult to stop (especially is someone suddenly jumps out at you). It can stop you in your tracks. While this short startle is easy to recover from, moderate to long term fears are truly limiting. When fears are high, the reaction is no action. Fear stops. Once that “button” is hit, and held, it limits you from achieving your full potential. Not only does fear stop you growth, it is also a method of control. If someone is living under fearful conditions, they will tend to do anything for safety.
Responding
Responding requires a certain amount of self-reflection and awareness. Instead of allowing fear to possess, you begin to respond to what the fear is hinting at. For instance, if you are afraid of public speaking, instead of giving in to your fear each time you talk in public, you begin to take on that fear head on. This may look different for everyone, but the point is to become aware on where your fears lie. In addition, as previously mentioned, the body can be a great tell on hidden fears we may not notice. If you leg is excessively shaking, it may be wise to check in with what may be causing it. Rather that allowing the emotion to control you, you begin to build a discipline to control it.
From the previous section, safety, a reaction to fear, was discussed. In this lies a key for growth. Fear leads to safety. Safety, while comforting, is not free. Freedom is fearless and helps one grow. Safety is fearful and cuts off growth.
Fear is ultimately a great teacher. It provides insights to our being, what we value and where we can grow. Through this one emotion, you can begin to grow in self-esteem. A step just below self-actualization.
Making Fear Work For YOU
Control
Controlling fear is different from ignoring, or disassociating from, fear. Controlling fear is the ability to respond, instead of react. This begins with noticing fears. Evaluating where they are attached to. Then, digging under the surface to see which value was in danger. Finally, building in new habits, exercises, and disciplines to become more secure in this fear.
In addition, you can use your body to help work through a fear. Breathing exercises can be beneficial in moments of fear. When you feel fear beginning to get a grip of you, stop. Take 10 deep breaths in the nose and out the mouth. Ask, “How appropriate is this fear to my present situation,” or “What story am I telling myself that is causing this fear to appear?” While breathing and evaluating, you can begin to take in what has just occurred and limit its mental and physical reaction.
Intelligence
Intelligence on fear is bringing it all together. We have to see fear, not as something to run from, but rather something to look towards. Fear is directly related to our inner most beliefs and values. It is also related to self-growth, as an increase in growth results in a decrease in fear. Lastly, it is created to keep you safe. As we saw with the Hierarchy of Needs, the more needs that are taken responsibility for, the less fear one obtains. Again, fear is a great teacher. Go towards (within reason) your fears in order to gain a full experience out of life.
Redefining Fear
Fear is an internal signal that something you value is in danger. Fear is a personal teacher about your inner beliefs and values that provides individual ways to unravel your true potential. Fear is perceived, subjective to the individual. Fear can be prevalent or rare based on your level of needs. Fear is both short and long term, affecting both the mind and body, and may result from the inner or outside world. Fear, while first limiting, may guide you on the path to becoming limitless.
Next, Emotion 2 - LOVE
